When a Near-Death Experience Unlocks Hidden Genius Part One

Hi everyone. I'm Ky Dickens and I'm thrilled to welcome you to the Talk Tracks. In this series, we'll dive deeper into the revelations, challenges, and unexpected truths from the Telepathy tapes. The goal is to explore all the threads that weave together our understanding of reality, science, spirituality, and yes, even unexplained things like psi abilities.

If you haven't yet listened to the telepathy tapes, I encourage you to start there. It lays the foundation for everything we'll be exploring in this journey. We'll feature conversations with groundbreaking researchers, thinkers, non-speakers, and experiencers who illuminate the extraordinary connections that may defy explanation today, but won't for long.

For our next two episodes of the talk tracks, we're introducing you to two new guests who didn't end up in the final cut of telepathy tapes season two, though they absolutely would've had we had more time. These guests share an incredible commonality and something we didn't quite get into in our episode on near death experiences. Near death experiences that result in acquired Savant Syndrome.

So many similarities come up time and time again in the interviews that we've done with NDE Experiencers. Often these are things like life reviews, engaging with some sort of light being or spirit guide, reuniting with loved ones who've passed, and the understanding that we are all part of a shared consciousness or source or oneness.

Also acquired savant skills. Having NDE sometimes turns on a hidden gift. First, you're gonna hear from David Ditchfield. After a horrific accident put him in the hospital with close to no chance of survival. David Ditchfield found himself pulled into a realm of overwhelming love, clarity, and presence. An experience so vivid

it changed everything he thought he knew about life and death. When he returned, he woke up with extraordinary gifts that he didn't have before. Including the ability to paint scenes that he said were shown to him on the other side. Today, David joins us to share what he saw, what he learned, and how his near death experience continues to shape his life.

My name's David Ditchfield. I'm based in Cambridge in the uk and I had a near death experience, which followed on from a pretty horrific accident. It, it was a, it was a rail accident. I'd been seeing a, a friend off at a station in Cambridge. And, uh, I, I, I, I was actually living in London at the time, but I'd just gone to stay with my sister and, and her family who were living in Cambridge.

And I was just kind of like hanging out there for a couple of weeks because I was very down on my luck. My life was in a really bad place. I was running outta money, I was running out of options, and I was about to be evicted from my apartment, so I needed to get away, so that's why I was there. And I just met somebody in London just prior to that, who I just made this connection with.

We just kind of like, you know, we got on really well; somebody called Anna who wanted to come and see me while I was in Cambridge. So. That's how that came about. She needed to get back to London. She'd got an appointment, so I was seeing her off. It was a, it was a February day, a very cold to beautiful day, actually not a cloud in the sky.

And, uh, she got on onto the train and I helped her onto the car with her bags and gave her a kiss and a hug to say goodbye. And it was at that point I had stepped back to get off that the automatic closing doors closed on my coat. It was like the bottom sort of corner of it. It was like a three quarter length coat, and I just couldn't pull it free.

I tried everything. I really tugged hard, you know, and that wasn't gonna happen. I, I looked around for a guard and there was no guard on that actual station, but unbeknownst to me, so I started banging on the doors, you know, I started yelling for help. And nobody turned up. This particular coat, it was like made of, it was a sheepskin coat, actually, that I, that I'd inherited.

And so it was quite an old one, so it was like, there's no way I was gonna put it free because there was no lining on on it. So it was, it was a, yeah, sort of really tightly fixed. So I thought, oh man. Yeah, I remember the, the engine started to roar on the train, but I say Roar 'cause that's how it felt.

'cause I suddenly felt like I was, for the first time in my life I was- I was facing death. I was looking death right in the eyes, and I thought, right, yeah. I went into fight or flight mode. I thought, and I'm gonna fight this. I'm, I, I'm not, I'm determined not to let this thing take me. I looked through the glass, I could see my friend looking at me with complete, complete terror in her eyes.

And, but then the train started to edge out. I felt every gear shift, you know, as I got, as I got pulled, I was, I was dragged along the platform initially and then I lost my footing and I was like, then I was sucked between the platform edge and the speeding train. And under went. And I remember that transition going from, um, you know, the, this beautiful sunny day into like this darkness, you know, it was just like pulled, being pulled into a very dark, violent machine and I was tossed around like a ragdoll.

So it was very violent and terrifying and I was fully conscious throughout all this, but I was still trying to hang on for life. By a miracle, I was just suddenly thrown in between the track as, as the train continued on. So I thought, it's not over yet. You know, I could get hit by part of the undercarriage, so I, I kept my face right down into the gravel, you know, and I could smell that oily gravel, but I was, it didn't matter.

'Cause I was, I thought I've got to survive. And clearly I did. The emergency guys jumped down onto the track and they started like, cutting through my clothes and they got me up onto, onto the platform, which is a- goodness knows how, but they did. Wheeled me into the back of an ambulance and then I, I, I jumped in, well, I jumped, we, we were in the back of the ambulance, and then the, the doctor who was in charge of the whole thing there said, look, we just come from a hospital around the corner.

That's how we got here so quick. But the one that's gonna save your life is a 30 minute drive. Can you hang in there? And I said, yeah, let's go. So we kind of went and screamed off down the highway, you know, with all the, you know, the sirens going. Arrived at the hospital in Cambridge, Adam Burg Hospital, which is a really big hospital, and there's a whole team of medics waiting there in the emergency department.

And you know, I could, I could hear fear in, in their voices. I didn't know what they were talking about. It was all science to me, obviously. But I just remember all this fast conversation going on and I was losing a lot of blood at this stage. So I, I kind of figured even then at that point that it's not all over yet, you know?

The surgeon who was in charge of the whole thing came up to me and said, look, we gotta take you straight into theater to start operating on you, but your family are here. Would you like to see them before we take you in? I said, well, yeah. I was really surprised that my family were there. You know, I thought, how did they get here?

But there they were. So they came in and I said, yeah, I'd love to see them. You know, I needed them. I needed my mom actually, it was really hard. I just had that thing where I just wanted to see my mother. And she came in and she was in tears, you know? And I was going, mom, I'm so sorry. So it's me bringing all the dramas to this family, isn't it?

And she was going, no, stop it. It's not your fault, you know, which, it wasn't my fault, but I was very keen to see my friend Anna, who I could see was sat at the back of the emergency department. And so I said, I need to speak to her before I go. And so she came forward and she was shaking her head from side to side, you know, and saying, I can't believe you're alive.

They announced over the speakers at the, when, when the train stopped. That thought that you were, it was a fatality that at the, at the previous station, so she assumed I was dead. So it was at that point that I left all the drama of the hospital. I left all the agony that I was in, you know, and, and I, I was suddenly, I don't, I was, it was kind of like, it was like a beautiful transition from that place into a lovely, small

what appeared to be a small, darkened room. And I figured, okay, this is it. I haven't made it. This is death. You know, I thought I'd died, you know, and I thought this, this is, you know, what's happened. I knew nothing about near-death experiences at all. You know, before this, I was non-spiritual. I had nothing to do with spirituality, you know, it didn't even occur to me.

So I just thought this, I, I, I'm dead. This is it. I didn't try to fight it or resist it, you know, I've since learned that some people who've had near death experiences do try to resist that initial pull, because they've got kids and stuff like that, which I didn't have that in my life then. So it wasn't really an issue, you know, to try and, and hang on. I didn't want to die, but I just felt-

everything I'd just been through, it just felt like it was so welcoming and safe that it was kind of like, it was almost like I was tempted to just stay and go with it. So I did. I looked round to get my bearings and I, and as I looked round in the small dark and space, I was suddenly greeted by these pulsating colors of lights.

They were like orbs that were slowly pulsating all around me, and this made me feel safe as well. This made me feel like I was in a, in, in a, in a good place. I wanted to check my body. I wanted to check the wounds, the, to see how everything was looking. And I, so I lifted myself up and, and looked down.

Everything was healed. Nothing, you know, everything was in place. There wasn't even a single scratch or bruise, you know, it was just like this, my, my body as it had been up until the point of the accident. In, in fact, even better. It just looked really pristine and I realized I was no longer clothed. I was just covered in this blue sort of satin, silky material. And, and I, I, I, I suddenly felt beneath me and I thought I, I'm no longer on the, the hospital trolley that I'd been bought in from the ambulance.

Uh, I was, I was now laid on this huge rock. It was like a huge sort of slate sort of rock. I, I describe it as being something like it's here in the uk like Stone Henge, or, you know, or, or medieval altar, you know, just something very primitive. And, but it felt remarkably comfortable. And so I kind of lay myself back onto this rock and I closed my eyes.

I needed to just almost like rest and, and adjust to where I was. And as I closed my eyes, you know, I laid there for a while and then lights started to appear through my eyelids, so I opened my eyes and there were like three symmetrical grids of white lights, very bright, pure white lights, so that were closing in towards me.

The light was so intense that, you know, you and I now would not be able to look into that light, you know? But in this realm it was, it was possible. And in fact, I couldn't take my gaze away from this light because I realized that it was, it was beyond just the just light itself. There was like a healing

energy coming from, from that light, from these grids. And I, I realized that the, the, the, the healing process was starting to heal all the trauma that I'd just been through my body and physically, but also mentally and emotionally. You know, the, the big trauma of going under a train, which was huge isn't it.

And I, so I was starting to feel even more calm and, and relaxed.

So I closed my eyes and went with this process of being healed. And as this process went on, I, I, I suddenly felt the presence of somebody was there, you know, that kind of well feeling. I always describe it as being, if you're taking an afternoon nap, you know, and somebody walks into a room, you just know someone's walked in, you know, and you open your eyes.

So I did, I, I opened my eyes and lifted my head, and there stood at my feet was this beautiful being an androgynous person. With this pure white blonde hair and, and, and skin that was like emanating light from, from within. And this person was like wearing a very simple contemporary black T-shirt, very similar to what I'm wearing now, but in, in black.

And was kind of surprised me. 'cause I thought, well if this is death, then I thought there'd be some kind of robed person or whatever, you know? But that wasn't the case. But I didn't mind, I didn't argue with that because I was more fixated by the fact that I knew this person's face, and I thought, but I couldn't figure where from, you know? And I was, I said out loud for the first time, I said

who are you? I know you don't, I I know I, where do I know you from? I know your, your face, you know. And this person just kind of then started to smile at me with a, with a knowing smile, looking back at me. And it was a reassuring smile as well, and said nothing. But I also then started to realize that information was, was coming through.

It was almost like telepathic, but it, it, but it wasn't, it was very strange because it was very clear, but it wasn't spoken. It was non, it was nonverbal, but I started to realize that this person was like the gatekeeper to, to, to, to what was happening at the moment. You know, this person was there to, to sort of guide me as to the process of what was beginning to unfold.

So I trusted it. I went in it, there was complete trust and faith, you know, and, and I closed my eyes again and laid back. And as the time went on I started to feel a sensation of more people, you know, had arrived. So I had opened my eyes again and either side of me with two female forms there. There was a girl to my right.

Very European in, in appearance. You know, wearing a, again, a simple brand dress, but quite dark skin, long brown hair, whereas the girl to my left was more American Indian, Asian, Indian, you know, south American, I'm not sure, but she had a really beautiful, sort of, sort of ornate dress on it. It was quite traditional dress and, and, and lovely dark skin, and they both had their hands slowly hovering over, over the contours of my body. And, and

i, I was, again, I was feeling the sensation of, of this energy that I'd felt from, from the grids of light, but it was more intense now. It was, it was just, I realized that the healing process that was happening, that was coming from their hands was, was going beyond just the, the physical wounds that I'd just received.

I realized that they were starting to heal the years of, of hurt, you know, that, that, that we all carry with us. You know, we, there's no avoiding that. We've all got stories that we, that we've carried throughout our lives, you know, and I felt like they were like literally releasing all, all the years of, of of pain or baggage that I carried with me throughout those years.

And, and they were just getting down to the, the pure essence of my soul. You know, they were getting down really deep and it was in an incredibly liberating feeling. It was just, I'd never felt anything like this before in my life because I'd never even allowed myself to even go there. You know? There was no sense of wanting to understand me or any pain that I carried throughout the whole of my life.

But this was, yeah, this was liberating. This was beautiful. And so I continued to bathe in all this beautiful healing energy. And then I started to, to think about my family because I was, as I pointed out, you know, my mother was in tears. They were all in shock, the whole family. And I thought, well, okay, well this, if this is death, then they're, they're clearly gonna be, my family are gonna be really upset

now they're, they're gonna be going through the fact that they've just lost me, you know? So. I decided to lift my head and see if I could see them. And so I edged my way over from this huge rock that I was still laid on and looked down and I looked down figuring if I looked down, I would see them in the hospital, but I couldn't see them.

I couldn't see them at all, but that was okay. You know, I, I kind of- me of old would've been feeling a sense of like panic and like, oh my goodness, I can't see my family. No. What, what's happened? You know, it is what, where am I? And why can't I see them? And but none of that happened. There was, there was a complete sense of, okay, well I can't see them now, but you know, they're gonna be experiencing everything that I'm going through now when their time comes and, and, you know, there was a sense of it-

it's all right. But what was more incredible was that the than the sight of not, not being able to see them, was this awe-inspiring view as I did look down. I was suddenly looking into a waterfall of stars, you know, a, a waterfall, the size of Niagara Falls, you know, Victoria Falls. It was vast. It was huge, you know, and I suddenly thought, wow, I'm no longer

in this small darkened space that I figured I was in. I'm actually in the universe itself, and I was just so awestruck. I was going, wow, look at this. And I was just kind of looking and instead of like billions of tons of water toppling over the edge, it was like billions of beautiful stars cascading over, you know, there were like shooting stars.

There was like all these beautiful displays and I was trying to fix my gaze and I felt like I was looking down into infinity. I was looking into one galaxy, into another. And I started to see colors form nebulous gasses, which was all new to me. I mean, up until that point, I had no interest in astronomy or the, the universe or anything.

It, you know, to me the universe was just that kind of black sky above me walking down the street at night. And with white sparkling stars, I knew nothing about nebulous. So all this was new. All this was very awe inspiring. And so I, I, I hoisted myself back over onto the rock and then I, I just kind of like laid back again and continued

to, you know, really relish everything that was, was appearing and, and, and also sensing that the knowledge was still coming through. The knowledge was that, that I, I was part of this, the universe, and that I was moving forward with the universal energy and that I'd always been part of the universe and I hadn't realized it.

So all that was kind of strange to me, but it all made sense at the same time. The most incredible part, really the most profound part was to happen right at the end of this whole experience for me was, as I'd lay there with my eyes closed, was I felt this beautiful energy that was coming from the, the hands of the healers and the lights was suddenly very, very intensified

now. In fact, I felt like every single molecule of my body was just like vibrating it, it with, with a sensation of love. And it was a sensation of unconditional love like I'd never experienced in my life. It was all, all the different types of love, like whether it be from, from my, my mother or my lovers or, or my pet animals, cats, dogs, whatever.

You know, all those different types of love all condensed and just coming through at once. And so I opened my eyes once more and looked, and I just, beyond the being of light, who was stood, still stood at my feet with the, uh, with the black t-shirt was this huge tunnel of white light that was coming through the universe, coming through the start and getting closer and closer.

And this tunnel of white light was like surrounded by very dramatic flames that were slowly circulating around the edge. And again, normally this would've been quite terrifying because it was quite huge and it was kind of like causing this sensation of, of physical vibration. I thought, what is going on?

What's happening? But I, there was no sense of terror or fear. Only complete trust. And, and what I was now being told was that this is the source of all creation. This is like not God as I had always figured God would probably be, look from my school books, you know, you know, you know the, the Michelangelo image of God on the ceiling of the Vatican with a long, great beard.

No, this was God. In the form of this huge tunnel of white light. And as it closed in on me, the, the vibration was so strong and just the knowledge that this was the source of all love, the source of all life was then causing me to just, I, I remember laughing out loud to myself at this, at, at this, knowing what I just learned, um, what I was feeling and, and, and, and experiencing.

I suddenly left it all, I suddenly came crashing back into my body and I was back in the hospital. I was like, sort of back, you know, all the pain started to rush through my veins and bones and muscles and, and you know, the, all the, the beautiful light that was there was suddenly replaced by the fluorescent strip that was, you know, screaming into my eyes from above.

And, and the, the noise and the drama at the hospital was like overkill. But there I was, you know, back. Back on Earth as it were, and I'd not even gone into surgery. You know, in terms of time, it was very hard to tell because it was probably not that long. Nobody could tell me because ev obviously at that point everyone was in shock.

Everything, everything that was happening, nobody could really remember. And, and, but it, it wasn't like it was, it was hours or anything like that, but it felt like, a lot of people ask me how long it felt to me to be in that other realm. And I always say that there's, there's no, the one thing I realized when I was there that there's no, there's, there's no sense of time

then. You know, time doesn't exist because I remember sensing to myself as I was there that for the first time in my life, i, I was no longer concerned with, with, with, with time. You know. I, I, I, I felt like I was in the present moment and that time didn't exist. I'd spent the rest of my, but my previous years being either concerned with the past, past mistakes I've made, opportunities I'd missed out on, or I was concerned with the future, worried about where my life was gonna go because I was running outta money and all those different things, you know, rather than being focused on the present moment.

Whereas in that realm it was just about the present moment and it was all about being present, which was just like a very powerful thing and something that I try to hang onto and, and, you know, and keep that in, in, in my life now.

Did you ever realize where you knew the mysterious white figure in the t-shirt from? That person was my higher self. You know, this is, this person had been with me throughout not only this lifetime, but all the previous lifetimes and, and, and what have you. You know, so yeah, that's how I knew that person so well.

That's how I recognized that person's face, but I couldn't pinpoint it. Yeah. And how long did it take to recover from the accident? Yeah, a couple of years in all to, to recover from it. Yeah. But when I was in hospital, you know. I remember the, the, the surgeon who was the consultant who was in charge of the whole thing.

You know, we, we, we formed a really good bond, you know, and he, he was saying to me, he said that you recco recovering at, at an incredible rate, considering what's happened to you. We don't get it. And I started to tell him. About what has happened. And he said, look, I'm a, I'm a doctor, I'm a scientist. I don't want to hear anymore.

Let's stop. Let's leave it at that. And, and laughed, you know, so, so there was, there was something, because it's really bizarre that was just when I, a lot of people say to me, when you did come back into the hospital, you must have been really gutted, you know, after all the, the beauty you've just been through.

And I wasn't, because I still felt, especially at the beginning, that I was still very attached to that other realm. I felt like I'd still got this umbilical cord coming through and there was like still energy coming from there. And when I was recovering in hospital, even though physically I was in a mess, you know, I could, I got tubes and wires coming out me that I got so much power inside of me that I was just like, you know, I was like, sort of like, it was, it was almost like the recovery for me was not

a struggle, you know, obviously yes, it was physically, you know, you don't come back super human. But in terms of my, my, well, my, my soul, my, you know, my inner self, I'd never felt so good in the whole of my life, you know? And that stayed with me, you know, and that helped me with the recovery. It's been, it is become a very big part of my life.

I've never really, I've never let go of it. And I guess the reason being is because, um, when I was laid the first night after, after I came out of theater, you know, they'd operate on me for about eight and a half hours, the first operation. And I remember lying in the hospital room, they'd given me a room on my own. And I was lying

I just got this R 2D two machine bleeping next, you know? And, and I obviously, I was, you know, I was thinking about processing what had just happened, going under a train. 'cause that's very, very big, you know, believe you me. But I was more fixated on, on what had happened. You know, the, the, the whole NDE, because as I say, I knew nothing about NDEs.

And I thought, am I the only person this has happened to? And I thought, I've gotta share this with people. 'cause this is like, I want people to know that that life continues on. This is, this is not the end. You know, I wasn't afraid to tell and share. Obviously I wanted to pick my moment, but, and I was scared I was gonna forget it all.

I was really scared. So I thought, right, I'm gonna do a painting. I wasn't not an artist, you know, I was, I was a, I was a manual laborer. You know, I was just thinking at work, whatever I could do up until that point, but I thought, I'm gonna do a painting and I thought I'm gonna do a big sort of like dramatic painting.

It's gotta be like those big sort of renaissance style biblical scenes, you know? I wanted to do something like that. So when I came outta hospital, that's the first thing I did once I was well enough, was to start this painting. And from that moment on I started to realize that again, I was still getting energy coming through from that realm, helping me to

to do this first, very first painting that I did based on my NDE. And I thought I was going, wow, this is amazing. This is like, this is not just me who's creating this painting. Something else is happening here. So I, I, I, I became prolific. I couldn't stop painting and I was just doing so many bits of artwork that, that, I guess I started to realize that this was like, almost like my calling, you know, because I remember at, at the beginning was I kept saying to myself, what is it?

Why have they sent me back? What is my purpose? I felt like I must have some kind of purpose here to have come back and from all that. And, and at first I thought I was gonna be a healer or, or helping people. But I realized that was my calling, that was just gonna- I was starting to, people were coming looking at my, my paintings as I was, as, as I was starting to put 'em together, and I start explaining to others, and I started to realize that people were interested and fascinated.

I've never looked for confirmation. You know, it's, it's more like sort of validation. I've done quite a few sort of online NDE conferences, you know, which have been mainly US ones actually. And, and that's when I started to realize, that's when I started to meet other people that had NDEs and we'd have kind of like a green room, if you like.

We, we kind of meet the night before just to kind of all, all say hi and meet each other. And what was interesting there was obviously we don't sit around sharing our experiences with each other, the actual NDE, but we'd talk about things that would happen that we'd noticed certain things that would, that that changed in our lives.

Just kind of small things, you know, we'd go, oh, I do get that as well. That kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah. I felt that as well. You know, like for example, I remember when I was in hospital, that when my family and friends would come in and see me, that, that, that they would, they couldn't touch the hospital bed, you know, because I was like full of static, you know, they were going, you really, you're like this electrical, you know, stuff like that, you know, which we kind of laughed about me and my family at the time.

I never really thought much about it, but just things like that, small things, you know, where people are saying, yeah, I had that as well. Everyone would walk into the hospital room and they couldn't touch the bed. I thought, ah, which is kind of nice. Those are kinda sweet things, you know? But, but it's still validation in, in, in, in a sense,

yeah. And what I realized as well is, is that obviously most people's stories differ a lot. You know, not everybody sees the same thing, but there's lots of things like the tunnel of white light that I've talked about, which is obviously that's, that's something that's quite universal, but Yeah. But, but all in all, you know, there's a sense that even though everyone's stories are different, you know, and some people have, have gone through different situations than me,

some people you asked about how long, you know it was when this all happened to me. You know, some people were in comas and stuff like that. And every, everybody's is different. I mean, that's why it's called a near death experience because it's kind of like you are, it's, it's at that point where you may

you may have flatlined or you may be very close to death as I was, you know, I mean, to, to go under that train was a, was a very close shave. And in fact, I remember the, because it was a big thing in the uk, the, the, the, the, the, we have like the, the, the UK rail police have to investigate it because of the, the, the nature of it, you know, for health and safety and stuff.

And they spent a year doing all this, you know, and, and so they interviewed me a lot. You know, they come and see me, you know, they said, oh, we've taken the, you know, the train down to London, we've stripped the doors down to the last rivet. You know, it was a very big job. And I thought, wow. And right at the end, I remember, you know, the head of the rail police said to me, well, we finished all our inquiries now, but you know what, David?

We don't get it. The whole team. We, we've done all our figures and maths and you should not have survived that. You should be, you should be dead now and not sat here talking to me. You know? And so it's, it's very strange. Yeah. Every, as I say, everyone's story is different, but, but there's a universal sort of sameness as well.

Mm-hmm. My phrase for it is ultra real. That's how I describe it. And because it is, you know, it's, it's kind of like- obviously people will say to me, which I'm completely open to as well, 'cause I I, the more questions that come, the better. That some people say, are you sure you know that it wasn't hallucination to do with medication?

Or are you sure it wasn't a dream? And I say, well, yeah, because, because hallucinations and, and dreams, uh they're more chaotic. You know, dream- if you think about it, when you have dreams at night, you know, even if you've had a really strong dream and you wake up the next day, say, Hey, I had this really strong dream last night that it is, they're kind of chaotic.

But not only that, that the, if you keep repeating that dream over, over time you realize that it starts to shift, it changes, you know, the, the, the narrative. Whereas like weird. Well, my own story that the narrative has never changed. I don't really listen back to what previous interviews I've done either.

I, in fact, I don't enjoy doing that. You know, it's not pleasurable for me. But, but there have been times when I've just come across a clip, you know, from something I've done before. Wow, you it. So nothing really changes, is what I'm trying to say. The it from, from what's happened, the whole experience itself, which is very far from being like a dream.

I, I think most people who've had NDEs will, will also agree on, and that is that the sensation that everyone does feel when they're there is a sensation of of love. You know, that, you know, as I said, there was, the healing energy that was coming through was an unconditional love that was coming through to me.

It also kind of like for the first time in my life, I felt love for myself as well. I'd never, and I realized I'd never done that. I'd never really had any self-love. And because I'd got no self-love up until that point in my life, I'd got no feelings of self-worth either, you know? And, and that that was a, a really important takeaway from me from that

experience. I think that, that a lot of us can try to explore because we don't, we don't really give, give ourselves enough spaces it were. We don't allow ourselves to stop, you know? Because it's like we're so consumed with, with our lives, you know? Because, you know, when I said to you earlier about where that thing about when I was looking down is the, into the waterfall stars and that sensation of, of being in the universe itself, and that we are part of that universe.

It's another thing that I think that we've forgotten that, that that's the case. If you think about it, you know, we're part of the animal kingdom, obviously, but we've, we're, we're not governed by the universe anymore. The rest of the animal kingdom is, whether they're birds, fish, you know, sort of tigers, moths or whatever.

Everything is governed by the laws of the universe. You know, birds migrate every year, you know, trees lose their leaves and all those different things and, and then regrow against spring time and what have you. Whereas like we've forgotten all that now. We we're, you know, we're, we're governed by technology now, which I don't mind.

I love technology. I love, you know, I, I don't try and shy away from it, but I think it's also important to remember that we are part of the universe and, and, and, uh, the universe is something that's, it's, it's a very beautiful, powerful force as well, and it, and it's one that wants to create. It wants to create life, obviously.

And it wants us to, to create and, and keep recreating rather than self-destructing, which is, which is obviously we're very prone to doing, you know, on a mass I'm talking about there, you know. So, so, so I think those were like really big lessons for me, you know, that I, I, I, you know, it's, it's interesting as well going back to the universe that I, I, I'm now fascinated by watching, you know, TV documentaries all about

how the universe works and stuff like that. And I, I, I started watching a series here in the UK on the BB C all about all the different sort of the NASA trips, going to the moon or whatever, all and interviewing astronauts, which I always find astronauts fascinating to, to be inter interviewed because, you know, to be an astronaut, you've gotta be a complete scientist, haven't you, just like going back to that doctor I talked about earlier, you know.

But they get moved. They, they get that profound sort of like out of body experience themselves, because they're floating around in space and they're looking back at our beautiful planet, you know. And some of the stuff that comes out is really quite beautiful and profound, you know, considering they're scientists.

So that says an awful lot. That's almost like saying that they've managed to step out of the, the technical sort of noise that we, that we surround ourselves with and they say the same thing as well. They say that when, when you're looking back at the earth, there's you, there's no sense of, of divide, there's no sense of wars or, or anything.

You know, you're just looking at this beautiful, beautiful, peaceful planet and all these beautiful colors, you know, and you just, you don't see that, you don't see conflict, you know, you just see all the, the, the, the beauties of nature all coming together, you know? And I guess that's, that's, that's a a very big thing for me, you know, just being aware that we are part of the universe.

That's it for this episode of the Talk Tracks, but new episodes will be released every Wednesday, so stay tuned as we work to unravel all the threads, even the veiled ones that knit together are reality. And please remember to stay kind, stay curious, and that being a true skeptic requires an open mind.

Thank you to my amazing collaborators, our executive producer Jill Pasiecnik, our producer Katherine Ellis, and associate producer Selena Kennedy. Original music by Rachel Cantu, opening and closing music by Elizabeth Pw. Original logo and cover art by Ben Kandora Design the audio mix, and finishing by Sarah Ma.

And I'm Ky Dickens, your writer, creator, and host. Thank you again for joining us.

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